Big fish, little fish polystyrene box
It was a drill my old school friend Luke and I had done many times before. Up at dawn, zombie walk into shower then running out the door soon after like Clark Kent out of a phone box with childlike excitement at the thought of catching the first wave of the day at sunrise. Sadly our excitement soon turned to disappointment as Luke, who was over from the UK for a quick visit and I arrived to find an ocean so flat it seemed we could have a run a marble across it. Time for Plan B.
We jumped back in the van and sped 10 minutes up the coast to Las Galletas which picks its swell up from a different direction and thus could give us the ride we jumped out of bed hoping for. Las Galletas literally means the biscuits and somebody on Magicseaweed.com was definitely taking the biscuit as our normally trusty forecast seemed it was playing tricks on us today. Flat as well. The high tide rides we dreamt of were still eluding us. We could have stayed in bed, but with the day still in its pajamas, we conjured up a Plan C: Due North.
An hour and 20 minute drive away, El Socorro beach is famous for its black sandy beach, enormous barreling waves and notorious for its vicious current which has been known to drag unsuspecting surfers and bathers for tours of neighboring islands. Though we’re not expert surfers, and we have a lot more enthusiasm than ability, we were confident enough that we could handle it and we’d spent enough hours dancing with the ocean since we first learned to surf in Newquay back in 2003 in an arctic October ocean.
On the TF-1 autopista which links the touristy south of the island to the much more interesting and authentic north, a third member of the team had joined us and the first opportunity to introduce Luke to my girlfriend Mia, not just a pretty face and dreamy long blond hair but also a very talented photographer who loved bringing her camera on our little sorties up north. On the way we agreed to stop in a little fishing village called Tajao for lunch and eat at one of its famous seafood restaurants and pile up on protein for our impending battle with the crazy currents of the rugged north coast. Little did we know this was to be our biggest battle of the day though.
Stepping into what was by far the busiest and most inviting of all the establishments where we sought our fish fix, laid out before us was all the catch of the day. No menus, instead everything that had been caught earlier in the day on display. Big fish, little fish, scary fish all the fish you could think of apart from Michael Fish – the infamous BBC weatherman who failed to predict a hurricane that wrought havoc through Britain one fateful October night in 1987. We started off asking for some little tiddlers, then some of them ones you reckon you might fancy yourself catching with a man –made spear Robinson Crusoe style then as we were about to finish our order Luke suggested we tackle one of the big boys. The kind of flapper you see on River Monsters on Discovery Max or Stevie Irwin wrestling. The waitress used both arms to pick it up what looked like a baby whale and slump it down on the scales to weigh it. I wasn’t sure about this. This was a lot of fish. I asked another waiter to check our order and make sure it wasn’t too much for 3 people but he reassured me that we’d order lots of little ones that we’d devour in no time and still have enough space to conquer Free Willy who was already being chopped up and prepared for us. Sure enough after all the prawns, squids and cuttlefish, we’d torn into we were exploding. If our bodies had been sewn together they’d be ripping at the seams. Then they bring out Free Willy on a plate the size of a boogie board. To try and eat it was like some form of digestive torture. Maybe the FBI would like to hear about this. Mission: impossible. We called the waiter and asked them to stick it in a box so we could spend the next week trying to finish it. It was Luke’s birthday so we agreed it could be his present and therefore his job to polish it off. Somehow though Mia still had space for dessert?
Still digesting the fish feast, we arrived late afternoon to the awe inspiring El Socorro Beach under the cover of grey skies after having sped past the cities of Santa Cruz, La Laguna and Puerto de la Cruz where I promised Mia a hot chocolate on the way home(I think that’s the only reason she came). Luke had visited 4 times in the two years I’ve lived in Tenerife and it was our second time at El Socorro but sadly the worst waves we’d seen so far. We grabbed a green tea each at a kiosk in the car park and assessed the situation. Luke didn’t want to get in the water let alone even get changed. I however, after having eaten what seemed like Hulk Hogan’s bodyweight in sea monsters needed to get my body moving. We surveyed the situation for a while trying to identify the best place to keep away from the current but still be in optimal position to get the best of a bad bunch of messy, dumpy waves coming in. We even spoke to the lifeguard who explained to us a little more about the current’s whirlpool effect and where we shouldn’t and should be if we didn’t wanna wave goodbye to Free Willy now in a box stinking out the van.
Wetsuits on, boards tucked under our arms and Mia with her customary camera in hand we trudged down to the beach, set foot on the cold and wet black sand and paddled out through the break. After we’d dodged a couple of sets of waves and come out the other side Luke was nowhere to be seen. Keeping a close eye on my position by using the beach reference points of the kiosk and the red no swimming flag, I tried to look for Luke who it seemed had gone off in the other direction and got caught in the current. I wasn’t worried though as I knew he was a strong paddler and would soon find his way back and sure enough it wasn’t long before I saw him in the distance clawing his way back in.
We both caught a few little waves but definitely not the ride of our lives and after having spent only a short time in the ocean but what seemed like a lifetime trying to not get caught in the clutch of the current, we decided to get out and quit while we were only slightly ahead.
Mia in that time had been on the beach snapping happily away with her camera not only photos of us but also a few random ducks that had decided to come and watch us surf. The sea was so choppy and messy and the current so unpredictable that even the ducks neglected to go for a dip and it seemed had stopped to see what these two crazy humans were playing at.
As the van moaned its way in second gear up the humungous hill that leads back to the autopista, we peered back down into ocean and saw an angry boiling ocean giving birth to countless waves exploding onto the beach. I was kind of relieved to be back in the van with a best mate by my side and sat in the back scrolling through the photos on her camera Mia, my beautiful girlfriend, best friend and soul bride. Someone once said to me you gotta frighten yourself to feel alive. Now I knew what they were talking about.
Keeping my promise to Mia of a hot chocolate on the way home, we stopped by Puerto de la Cruz and inevitably Mia got her way and it turned into hot chocolate, cakes and ice cream and we had some fun telling Luke to go ask for the bill in Spanish by saying ‘mi madre’ which actually means in case you don’t know already ‘my mother’. Luke once asked for ‘le sugar’ on a surf to trip to Biarritz in France so it was another chance to pull his leg about something for the next few waves.
It had been a great day with two of my favorite people on the planet, taking in some of the best sights on this paradise of an island I’m lucky enough to call home. Slumping into bed my soul exhilarated but my body annihilated my last thought turned to Free Willy who was now stinking out fridge and on tomorrow’s lunch menu. We’d started the day chasing giants. We were about to spend the next few days eating one.
РЫБА, СЕРФИНГ И ПРОГУЛКА ПО ПУЭРТО ДЕ ЛЯ КРУСУ
Поездка наша планировалась давно. Но, учитывая постоянное изменение планов в последнюю минуту, я не думала что она вообще состоится.. :) Однако в 2 часа дня (вместо запланированных 11 утра) мы таки собрались с Брэдом и его бэст камрадом Люком съездить на пляж в El Socorro дабы мальчики смогли потешить свое самолюбие катанием на досках. Сказано - сделано! И вот мы уже едем по направлению на замечательный, зеленый и плодородный (а также во всех смыслах плодовитый) Север острова Тенерифе. . .
По дороге выяснилось что все голодные ну-вот-прям-до-обморока, решили остановиться в Tajao - одной из рыбацких деревушек, раскиданных по всему острову, где дают самую классную рыбу, которую я когда-либо пробовала. Вообще надо сказать, на Тенерифе есть три супер-места, где можно и нужно попробовать рыбу: Tajao (свежо, вкусно, недорого, быстро и всегда дружелюбно), Los Abrigos (вкусно, средне по ценам, местами дружелюбно) и La Caleta, Fañabe (дорого, сердито, льстиво-дружелюбно и иногда вкусно-свежо…Для туристов в общем). Мы, как вечные тридцатилетние студенты, разумеется, выбрали Тахао - благо он был нам как раз по дороге.
В общем, то, что в результате нам принесли, мы, честно, смогли доесть только спустя 3 дня. У голода и страха, как известно, глаза велики, и мальчишки заказали НЕЧТО, ласково названное Брэдом "Годзиллой", по размеру напоминающее маленького дельфина, по виду - тунца весом с центнер. Забыла как она называлась, к сожалению. В следующий раз когда закажем - запишу. :)
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Не думаю, что понятен весь масштаб, но вот это чудо-юдо морское на пол-зала))) / Can't really see the size but that beast is what we've ordered being all just too hungry to think! :)
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